Negotiating Conflict

We all experience conflict in our day to day life; it can be stressful but also can have a positive outcome. Here are some tips on negotiating and resolving conflict:

  • Active listening: Demonstrate your interest in the other person with non-verbal cues. Maintain eye contact, don't interrupt, and let the person vent. Clarify by asking questions. More on active listening.

  • Acknowledge and restate the other person's feelings and concerns. 

  • Deep breathing: Using a deep breathing relaxation exercise helps you to monitor your own stress level. Breathe in through your nose, hold in the air for 3-5 seconds, and then exhale slowly. Repeat.

  • Maintain your boundaries: Change what you can to improve the situation and let go of what you can't control. Take responsibility for what's yours and apologize if appropriate.

  • Communicate your own feelings and needs: Utilize I messages. Don't take it personally.

  • Find points of agreement that you both have in common. 

  • Utilize problem solving skills: Identify the problem concretely, brainstorm solutions to the problem, agree and commit to the best solution, think through the consequences of the best solution, try the best solution, re-evaluate it, confirm details of the solution, and keep your promises.

Related Topics